Where the fuck did the week go?
Not sure if I'm dreaming this, or if I'm just still fucking pissed. Had a bit of luck today. Some cunt said he wanted to be my agent, or did he say he was a secret agent? Who fucking cares, either way I chinned the cunt and robbed him and his missus of their shopping. I got fags, whiskey, food, and some big cunt of a box with something called an Xbox 360 in it. Didn't know what the fuck it was, but I did know it was worth something, and I flogged it to a couple of school kids for 20 quid, fucking lovely!
Offered a prozzy 10 quid to suck me off, but she told me to fuck off. The next thing she did was scream blue fucking murder after I dropped the nut on her. I hope I broke the cunts nose.
Went into Morrisons this afternoon, coz they have more choice on stuff to eat. Scoffed two bags of sausage rolls and went to the instore toilet for a shit, and when I found all the cubicles were full, I shit on the floor, but I picked it up incase of an emergency, and sure enough, just as I came out of the bog, there was the fucking manager and two cunts from the bakery section. Just as he opened his mouth to no doubt tell me to leave, I let him have it right in the mush. That'll teach that cunt not to talk shit!
Saw a family leave to go on holiday this morning, so I'm house sitting for them. All I needed was a brick for the back window. Fucking sorted!
shitted by Wobblingscruffbag @ 1:36 am
7 Comments:
Dear Wobble, I'm so glad to hear you are in out of the cold. It promises to be a harsh summer this year. I do hope they have left you enough food. What's the toilet like?
I'm a tad worried about all this nutting of women that you have been doing lately. It could cause you brain damage in later life. Please be careful. Make sure you nut them directly on the nose, it softens the impact on your forehead.
Lots of love and kisses from the Bash Street boys.
Whenever I see someone expressing concern for a homeless person I'm touched.
Only the other day I was walking down the laneway when I saw a bag lady pushing all her worldy goods in a tartan shopping trolley.
She looked haggard and worn out as I aproached her. This could be someones Mother, Sister, Daughter.....
Feeling the warmth of human kindness gushing up inside of me like Niagara falls in reverse, I withdrew something from my pocket and pressed it into her hand, whispering "I know what you need, God Bless".
The tears of joy fell from here eyes like a newborn babys' as she gazed down at the literary agents card that I had given her.
Another life I had touched for the better.
God Bless you all with sugar dumplings and humungous hugs ....
Is this all you have to do over on the other side of the pond?
Wow. I am SO glad I stopped in over here. You are SO talented and tasteful. Gee whiz. Why are the book agents not coming after YOU? I can't even imagine.
Bet you didn't think YOU'D be subject to any public scrutiny, did you?
Stay in Cuntinghamshire and don't bother the rest of the Internet. And stop impersonating Wandering Scribe, for fuck's sake. If she's a fake, then get off your boring British ass and let www.the smokinggun.com know about your suspicions. Those people will get a lot further than you ever could a lot faster.
Dear Miss Kitty misses the whole point of this blog and the comments. We don't really give a shit if Wibblingscringe is a fake or not anymore. We're having so much more fun here!
Still, we can't really expect bloody Yanks to appreciate us. Humourless shower of shite! Think George Bush.
All my love, Wobble, I REALLY do love you, really. Hugs and kisses.
She might be missing the point, but I wouldn't miss her head with a fucking hammer.
Fuggerr bazdarrrr!
Hey, I'm a damn Yank, and I appreciate you brits, you fucking bastards!
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