Sad to go.

Today was the day for me to leave the happy dwelling, before the owners came back and, via the Police, got me a new, more confined dwelling. So it was with a heavy heart, and the remaining bottle of Scotch, that I left my happy home to return to the woods.

Last night I gorged myself as much as I could on the food that was left, and drank the last three bottles of wine. I smashed the place up pretty good ( made a right fucking mess of the new LDC TV) and pissed all over the settee. Back on the PC, I used their scanner to scan a couple of photo's of the lady of the house, and stuck them on a few web sites.You know, the kind where you advertise that you will pay to take it up the arse, or you really want someone to come round and beat fuck out of you. I did of course include the address and home and mobile numbers!

I noticed I had been sent a few Emails, and one of them said that they were going to name their unborn child after me, Anya Shittyarse Jones! It fair brought a tear to my eye, and vomit to my throat. There were also plenty of arse licking messagers from a load of sad cunts saying things like, 'Oh you inspire me so much, I can't wait for your book, and I hope we can meet one day' They had better pray we fucking don't! It just goes to prove that the world is full of cunts.

Before going to bed (passing out) last night, I put 6 spoons of Andrews into a half pint of water and downed it in one. I was preparing myself for this morning. As soon as I woke up, I could feel my belly churning, and I knew I didn't have much time. I ran to the front door, dropped my trousers, and squirted liquid shit all over the bottom of the door and the surrounding carpet. I wish I could see their faces when they push the door open on their return!

With that last job done, I wiped my arse across the wall, and went upstairs to change my underpants, coz the ones I had on were making even me feel fucking sick!
I didn't take any of the skinny cunts clothes coz they were too fucking small.

When I saw a taxi coming down the road I knew it was time to fuck off. I left by the back door, and scooted over the fence and down the entry.
I hung around about eight houses away and waited. It was fucking worth it, coz as the lady of the house opened the door, she looked paralysed for a few seconds, and then she let out this incredible fucking scream, that was deafening from even where I was!. Fucking result!

Now I'm back in the library, getting the usual fucking stares. Time I left.

Ok, off to Sommerfield for me. I'm fucking starving!