Released into the wild
Well, they released (booted) me from hospital this morning. It seems they could no longer stand the smell, or my expertise in the game of basket ball. I made my way back to my squat in the woods so I could ponder the next chapter of my book "Lifes Shit", and get it down on my laptop.
I was in for a bit of a shock, coz there was a bird waiting for me! She said her name was Anal Peters, and she was blown away by my pics in 'Scat Monthly'. She said she was desperate to see me in action, so I obliged and dropped my trousers and got into character, so to speak.
Just after I'd delivered my third log, there was a noise behind me, and another bird walks up to me! This one was called Eva Deepfries, and she was another fan of the wobbling man!
Well' the first bird didn't take kindly to this, and started shouting 'He's mine you
American cunt!', and went for her. I dived out of the way, and had just started to pull up my pants, when they started picking up my shit, and lobbing it at each other, like a pair of fucking monkeys in the bastard Zoo!
They were soon both covered in shit and rolling on the ground, but the English bird seemed to be winning the fight. No surprise really, the other cunt was just a fucking yank. Nice tits though.
I left the stupid cunts to it, and went off with the yanks handbag. I found enough in it to get a supply of cider (my eyes were famished of cider), and two portions of cod and chips.
A short while later, I was well fed and watered, and sat down for a better look through her bag. There wasn't much, just a bible and her passport. I struggled to decide which one to wipe my arse on, so in the end I settled for both.
A really fucking weird thing happened then. I was walking down the road, and I heard some cunt shouting that he wanted to die. It was some twat in a wheelchair pouring petrol over himself. The trouble was that like most spakkas, he didn't think ahead, and didn't have any matches, so I gave him mine.
The cunt went up like a fucking bonfire, and he was screaming his fucking head off, and people started to come out of their houses, so I thought I should fuck off. I was already bored with his screaming anyway. still, one less window licker in the world.
shitted by Wobblingscruffbag @ 6:51 am
24 Comments:
Cunt...
ok it works....
Fucking Brilliant.
Where can I get me one of those go faster wheelchairs because I too wheel about all day moaning to anybody that listens about how much in pain I am, but I soldier on, never complaining.
Unless it's on my blog where I go on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on.
Having a wheelchair on fire would certainly highlight the plight of dribbling mongs such as llike wot I am.
You deserve a knighthood Mr Scruffbag.
@ cunt
All cunts are welcome here. After all, I think you're all cunts.
@ Mary, Thank you, I'm glad you realise your place in the scheme of things.
that wheelcahi is driving on the WRONG side of the road.....
Had a fiery accident in your wheelchair in the last three years?
Shit your pants after being doused in petrol and suffered a near miss?
Then ring Claims Direct on our freephone number (0800 916 9010) and find out how you could claim up to £17.50 (after processing and administrative fees) absolutely free of charge.
Our call centre operators (with only the slightest grasp of English) are standing by in Delhi RIGHT NOW !!
"Where there's a claim, theres an ambulance chasing cunt!"
Do you think they have a branch of Claims Direct in Reston Virginia?
Come on wobble. Shit for us.
Its been a while since you opened your brown curtains and let one slide out.
You can't spell 'weird', you semi-literate fuck.
Oi cunt, you've obviously got a book deal and are keeping us all in the dark. Any chance of an update at all, sometime soon perhaps?
You can't spell 'weird', you semi-literate fuck
Another blind cunt.
aaaaah, you're still alive then! How's it hanging? Missed you!
Hugs xxx
We want Wobbles brown scat dribbling down our chins.....
I have completely changed my mind about real Wandering Scribe and I apologise to her and everyone else for everything I have said so far. I have re-read her blog and realise that I was wrong to spread lies about her, impersonating her and make fun of the way she has been living the past year.
When I'm wrong I don't mind admitting it, and I was.
Sincere apologies and goodbye.
You could at least get the name right, you thick cunt!
So much time, so little to do, selling other people's ideas and dreams, ever have the feeling you've been cheated?
Post some more you apathetic twat !
Next time I see a tramp I'm gonna throw petrol on the cunt and watch him burn.
God loves you!
God loves you too, but everyone else thinks you're a cunt.
you're a really boring bastard!
Such foul language!
You sir, (or madam), are a first class cunt.
It tickles me to see how many times each day you have to write in on the cerak blog. It is too funny that you are so lifeless. I dont have any connection to them. But I do know a spineless, little british worm when I read one. You are a pitiful little freak. I hope the Queen Mum is proud of you and all the other little freaks who entertain you.
I hate to break this to you, but the Queen Mother died some time ago.
I love the way you Americans keep up with world news.
I always take an interest in international news stories.
For instance, I had a great laugh watching those towers in New York fall like so much shit dropping into a toilet.
LoL. "Will the light shine through under this broken roof?"
Post a Comment
<< Home